litch: (Default)
So I cleared out the area under the sink and took a closer look at the disposal (I've always called them disposal's but most of the hardware website seem to call them diposERs, according to dictionary.com I'm right and they're wrong nyah-nyah). First thing I noticed is there is a small puddle under it. Not good but all sinks I've ever seen leak a little occasionally so I wasn;t too worried.

Found the reset button for the disposal [livejournal.com profile] pi3832 mentioned. Pushed it and it hummed for a bit then popped again. At least it's not the house wiring (my dark nightmare), it's the unit itself. Got up and waggled a plunger handle in there and ran water to see if I could free it but when I pushed the reset it just hummed again and then popped. This time I noticed there was a drip from the bottom of the unit, but not from the plumbing connection point as I had been expecting but from an inspection plate.

I looked around the house for 15 minutes trying to find a flat bladed screw driver to take it off (who the hell uses flat screws anymore?) and finally had to use a screwtip in a nut driver. Took the plate off and confirmed that the leaking was coming from inside the unit. Pushed the reset button again and it hummed for a while then I saw a flash and it stopped. So something is shorting out inside. I was about to poke at the wire connections to the house romax the access plate was there for but then realized the line was still hot, there thing was damp and I knew it was shorting and apparently made my save against stupidity roll.
litch: (Default)
my disposal died a week or two ago, I just flipped the switch and it didn't come on. I poked around at the wires, made sure the ciruit breaker hadn't tripped but nothing happened. Since a new one is going to be 150$+ I've not been too hepped up to do anything about it, just throwing stuff in the trash more than I would have thrown down the sink and running lots of water when I do throw stuff in there.

Enfortunantly something I threw down there seems to have taken root:
litch: (Default)
A/c is going now, actually it started going as soon as we powered it up. But the igniter kept going off continuously, and the only way to turn it off was replace the board. He couldn't see any reason for it to freeze up like it was, there was a little gunk on the coils and in ther drain tube but not enough to cause the problem. He went through and cleaned out everything anyways.

Cost me 470$, thankfully I get paid friday. Every month for the last 3 months or so I have had an unexpected 400$ charge, I had to pay for my truck, then I had to take the dogs to the vet, now this, I had to pay a couple hundred the month before the vet for refinance fees (inspection and something else that weren't covered by the refinance). and it is really starting to get to me. I am barely paying all my bills (even with the refinance) and this is just cracking my spine.
litch: (Default)
Slept all night with the windows open and the fans going. A little warm but not too bad, when I got up at 6:15 it was 81 in the house. I went ahead and shut all the windows and pulled the blinds in a futile effort to keep out the heat this morning.
I opened the house up last night when it was 88 outside and 87 inside and immediately realized I had failed to consider the difference in humidity inside (low 15-20% I'd guess) compared to that outside (44%).

It was actually kind of pleasent sleeping with the windows open, except that upon waking my eye were caked with goo and my sinuses were coated with a nice layer of nightblooming mold. If it weren't for that I could really get into sleeping with open windows but the humidity and the mold is just too damn unpleasent. I feel like I have steel wool under my eyelids.

The a/c tech is coming out at 1 today, hopefully the doggies won't get too hot until then.
litch: (Default)
so I was trying to watch tv and I started hearing this buzz, I'd put a fan in the in the upstairs window and I thought it might be the fan vibrating against the sill but when I went up I heard it coming from the HVAC.

I have everything set to off so I couldn't figure out what could be buzzing, I pulled the front plate and looked around inside and determined it was the heaters electric igniter firing constantly. Tried to pull the power cables and got shocked for my effort, looped a non-conducter around the black and then the white wire and popped them off the circuit board but it kept humming away.

I finally popped the breaker and it quit. This is upsetting me a lot, the I am scared of my house being broke, the heat is just miserable, it's 87 in the house and 86 outside. I worry that my sloppy maintenance has caused this, hell I know my sloppy maintenance has caused this and I feel miserable and like I deserve even more misery.

Crap, it's started again, evidently that braker only controls the outside unit, now I get to play guess the heater igniter circuit, so down the computer
litch: (Default)
My a/c wasn't cooling well, so fearing that it had frozen up I checked the filter and found it needed changing, replaced it with a new one and turned off the A/c and left the fan on to melt any ice blockage and poured some bleach down the drain to kill any mold that might be backing up the tube.

It kept cutting out, so afraid it was over heating the fan I turned everything to off. It went off but it kept pulsing like it was trying to turn on than changing it's mind. After 5-10 minutes it stopped that and I decided I'd call strand tomorrow to come look at it (I was wonder what was going to cost me 400$ this month).

After half an hour I tried to turn the fan back on, nothing.

Checked all the breakers, found a gfci that had popped (but it doesn't seem to have anything to do with the HVAC, it's something for the bath I believe) and reset it. Still nothing.

Took the front panel off and it looks like there is power getting there (there's an LED on the circuit board that's lit up) but discovered a puddle of water at the bottom. Mopped it up and when I checked the new filter found it was full of water as well, pulled it, poured the water out and left it out to dry, poked around as much as I was comfortable but couldn't figure out the secret to making the fan come on.

It's 82 in the house, 92 outside and expected to rise until it hits 100 sometime this evening.
Edit6:15 and it is 86 in here and 99 outside (according to joebot)
Edit8:30 and it is 87 in here and 92 outside (according to joebot)
litch: (Default)
After much struggle I bought a bag of diatomaceous earth the other day and powdered a patch of lawn that has not grown well since we moved in. I'm not sure what is causing the problem, but I suspect grub infestation. I sprinkled nematodes over the area last year and it didn't do anything so I am trying this. If it doesn't work I am abstractly considering digging the fucker up and putting in a pond in my front yard.

I have been playing with this idea of a small above ground cistern I could use to store collected rain water and use to water my property. The idea would be to simulate a small creek running from the top front of my yard down and around and out the back into the ditch and have it run something like continuously. Use it to feed a few planter beds as it flows.

I don't think I could run it off just harvested rain water without a huge cistern, but a small one that would be augmented by tap water and presented as some sort of natural ediface might work. Pump it out through a small fountain into a pond, and then let that pond over flow into the creekbed.

The diatomacious earth suprised me, I was expecting it to feet rough but it's increadibly smooth and soft, like talc or confectioners sugar. I enjoyed playing with it so much I sprinkled around the pecan and my front door. I am going to work some in the dogs fur and circle the house with it. It's such increadibly cool stuff, it came to me that it's almost a nanotech product, naturally produced but so simple it seems almost engineered.
litch: (Default)
My back has been sketchy lately, it hurts to bend over, to loosen my hips and lean in a direction. I really hate that, it's entirely too common a coda in my bodysymphony. The last time I did weightlifting it really helped that dramatically and I've been hoping the increaded activity I've been engaging in would help but it sems to have just gone the other direction of giving myself more oppurtunities to strain and hurt myself.

Speaking of, yesterday when I noticed the pain I was really confused because I didn't remember straining my back but this morning driving in to work I was dumbfounded. I had forgotten how hard I had worked sunday on my house. I really pushed myself doing yard work, lots of time running a weed whacker which is the devils own tool of back aches. I even remembered this morning a couple of occasions doing the work sunday when I paused realized I was tired and should go rest and rehydrate but decided to keep working because I wanted to get things done. Interesting attempt at self-sabotage, wonder why working in the yard evokes such antinomy in me.

I am thinking about getting some dumbells to take up weight training again.
litch: (Default)
Well my yard looks a few hours of work better. Edged everything in the front yard (didn't get the side yard), found my lopers and took out a few upstarts. Cleared the grass out away from the base of the pecan and the sage, I've decided I am going to cut that sucker short. Raked up all the crap I'd clipped and pulled back. Filled the hole tipareth had dug under the fence gate. Whacked the flowerbed. Tried to fix the spigot and wound up just giving up and letting it leak, it's got an anti siphonin dowhidget that's gotten befucked. Threw away the broken sprinkler and found a working one and now I am watching the birds play in the fountain.

Relationships are still scary.

My first relationship was with my mother, that primacy shaped so much of who I am. She was 37 when she had me, she had had 4 other kids and was starting to have grandkids when I happened accidently. I think she felt she had a chance to do it over again right with me, a second chance at motherhood. The problem with that was she became even more over protective than she had been with my sibs. She'd also try to be very encouraging but I think in part because she was a frustrated girl geek from the segregated south she had a tendancy to do it in way that carried a lot of expectation. The two aspects together meant I got told a lot as a kid "you're fantastic" but never allowed any oppurtunity to be fantastic, and anytime I started to fuck up she'd swoop in to rescue me. It doesn't take very many times of that happening before you begins to doubt yourself, to wonder "if I'm all that fantastic how come she never lets me get myself out of trouble?".

Also tied into that frustrated girl geek thing was a serious depression she never did anything about. My dad was away so much while I was growing up that she depended on me for a lot of emotional support. I was the thing in her life which gave her the most pleasure & satisfaction. So with the depression feeding that fundamental lack of satisfaction in her life I couldn't always make her happy. She started seeming needier and needier and that got exacerbated with I started going into puberty while she was hitting menopause full steam.

We had a lot of fights, both of our endocrine systems were spiraling out of control and she was depressed and I was depressed and we were each others primary source of emotional nourishment and it just got ugly. Every time I would fight with her it would rake me that I was hurting the person who ment most to me and who needed me so much, which would make me even more viscious.

Eventually I left and went away to school. Not emotionally equipped for that I didn't do well. I bounced, did the renfair circuit and began to find myself when I was out away from her. Went back to school and started retreating from our relationship, but couldn't completely because she was paying the bills. Spent a lot of time doing the ugly dance of her trying to not antagonize me but constantly undermining herself with her need, trying not to control me but being in a situation where she did control me through finance and her shadow would creep out.

The night before I graduated, I told her I was pagan, bi, and did drugs. She was a republican stalwart who pined for nixon. We had a nasty fight. I was broke and had nothing to do, I moved to Austin to be near [livejournal.com profile] ce_luna who I'd fallen in love with and who'd dumped me the year before.I worked a job as a night kennel boy and overflow euthanizer at the dog pound (on the theory that the first job out of college should be the worst job you can imagine so things have to go up from there). Once I was convinced she wasn't going to change her mind I moved to the mountains, stayed with my sister, then some friends from school and finally a room in a house lost a couple jobs and all my money. When my car died I used the last of what I had to get home to my mom and dad's place in Arizona.

I hated depending on them. Her depression was out of control so she was constantly fighting with either my dad or me or just retreating and not interacting. I couldn't find work and just spiraled down into my misery. My nephew finally got me a job fixing airplanes with him. I used the money from that to buy my truck and tools and went out on the road fixing planes for a while. Spent more time reviewing the person I had discovered myself to me.

I took a vision quest and set about carying out that vision of moving to Austin and marrying Nancy. That seemed to be a turning point in my relationship with my mother. I could begin to forgive her and allow a sort of rapproachment. I have in my files somewhere email from my mother from that era. They are the most miserable, unhappy blandishments you can imagine. Nancy would get mad because I would sink into depressions for days after one of her messages. I was able to provide her some succor, I sent her CD's I found I knew she would like, I would write her about the happiness I was discovering, commsierate with her over the things her other children did or seemed to do to her. But by then her depression had eaten so much of her I don't know if that really mattered, between the distance, and the boundaries I had begun to learn to build, and the obvious focus I had on my own life I doubt she noticed it much.

I was in the shower at the house on Evans when I heard the phone ring late one night, we usually didn't get night calls unless it was someone making a death threat or something (this was back when I was active in CMA). I heard a tone in Nancy's voice that sounded serious so I got out of the shower and she told me my mother had collapsed and they'd take her to the hospital but it took a long time to get the ambulance there and she wasn't responding.

I flew to AZ and when I finally got to go to her side she was on a respirator, her eyes were fized and she was unresponsive to physical stimulation. I still can feel the horror as I would hear the sound and watch he chest rise unnaturally as the machine breathed for her. I kissed her cheek, said that this wasn't my mother, she wasn't here any more and calmly walked out of the CCU to a bathroom where I proceeded to destroy a stall and some other bathroom equipment.

I wish she could have seen my house after we bought it.
litch: (Default)
Ahh the joys that are ssris

So after feeling absoloutely yucky yesterday morning I took that shower and nap then got up and went shopping, did some yard work and watched a lame sci fi movie (Alien Seige) and made some refried beans that didn't taste quite right.

In the bad days before the wonder drug there is no way I could have gone to feeling that low to feeling perky like I do this morning, I'd be in the ditch for at least the rest of the week. Instead I can essentially sleep it off, get up and start over.

I think part of my mood yesterday was the yard, it had gotten pretty jungly I kinda liked it being very natural looking, I would from time to time go through and pull unwanted interlopers and let the res grow as it would but then it started to outgrow that and got more vacant lot looking. Finally my neighbor came by and weed whacked the front strip between the sidewalk and the street. It made me feel really self-conscious and I wrought death (or at least mowing) on all in my dominion, I still need to edge some more and clear out the flower bed in front of the window but it is much more suburbanly acceptable. I think it really was ok, until it started getting hot and I didn;t want to take the time to be as selective about what was growing in my lawn.
litch: (sides)
I can't decide if I should buy a perm account.

I'd like one, and since I have used LJ for 4 years it's likely I'd recoup the six years worth, but I'm still hesitant, finances look like they might be a little tight for the next four months¹. I'm also not sure how comfortable I am with the new corporate masters, 6 Apart. I think I am going to regretfully pass but I am going to worry I made a lousey decision, especially each march.

¹Read more... )
litch: (Default)
Awww crap!

So my bank did a apprasal on my house and came up with a value of 143k. The value dan gave us that we used to determine nancy's equity was 150k.

The pay off for the existing loan + nancy's check is 112, they can only give me a home equity loan for 80% of the appraised value minus the mortgage. Since 80% of 143 is 114 I only qualify for little more than a couple thousand for the home equity and it's not worth their time to make a home equity loan for that small a number.

So somehow I need to come up with my share of the money I need to pay off our credit cards and close out the account to meet the demands of the decree.
litch: (Default)
To contrast my delightful activities in the park (it's cool when people come up and ask me what I am doing and after I explain thank me for my civic contribution and wish me well).

I haven't done a craptastic thing in my yard. It's very pit like. I cling to the fantasy that I am just expessing a very native wild grassland thing but the truth is it is very hard for me to do yard work at my home. I wonder if this will change when I close on the refinance.

I've been cleaning at my truck, it needs so much work...

I was thinking of bidding the detail job out, anyone want to make 150$ to:
wash outside, using a brush to get through the grime and including the wheel wells and tires
brush entire inside (there is an insane amount of doghair), vacuum, shampoo & brush again after it's dry and vacuumed
wash all the controls & cabinets
wash windows
wash all seals on the cab and apply silicone lube to them
"wax"

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